MARY LORRAINE DANROTH
Guess what reading can do...it opens your eyes to read your words come from someone else...weird.
I wish adoptive parents would be warned that the little boy they adopt might not turn out to be the football player homecoming king they always wanted, and the little girl might not grow up to be the cheerleader sorority girl that you can’t help but love because she’s so cute and pretty! No, the kid might be average looking, pimply, be bad at math — you know, like any other kid.
Bio kids of course carry the burden of expectations from their parents too. But when those kids don’t fulfill all of the parents’ transferred hopes and dreams, the kid still has personality traits, physical traits, and mannerisms that are genetically linked to and resemble that of the parents. The parents can still see enough of themselves in the child to smooth over any minor disappointments and shortcomings.
Shut up — I’ll TELL you what your experiences were that I did not witness and have no knowledge of!
When I’ve tried to talk to friends about this as an adult, I am accused of exaggerating, remembering wrong, and was even told once that I chose to remember negative things because “everyone knows that adopted people come from inferior genetics.” It can be hurtful to talk about these experiences with the non-adopted, who would rather label you a liar or drama queen than admit that the system places infants in physical and emotional harm’s way more often than they think, and despite the best intentions of the very people who inflict that harm.
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