New

It's not all about learning something new everyday, sometimes something new will happen with me.

The clinic called me yesterday because the doctor requested me to come in. This has never happened to me. I have never had someone want to see me. I'm used to being ignored. I'm used to the rejection that I've had since birth from multiple people.

I don't think I will ever be comfortable with anyone wanting me. It's one on those things that I may never get through. The anxiety I get from such a simple request almost makes me bedridden. It hurts that this all goes back to my birth family and the rejection of wanting me to go away again.

And once again I grieve. Daily.

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