More sadness

Everyday I get to thinking about my rejection and if it affects my niece and nephew that I have never met. I'm sure my niece knows about me...and I'm sure she's been told horrible things about me pertaining to my initial communication with my sister. I'm not so sure about my nephew.

I know I have 4 nieces and 1 nephew on my paternal side, I don't know for sure if they have been told about me...some of them are quite young.

I have 4 nieces and 3 nephews on my husband's side but for some reason I don't feel the connection that I think I should have.

I just want to know more about my 'family'. I want to know if they have any of the same traits as my children. I want to know what their interests are. The bottom line is...I want to meet them...I realize that this is probably too much to ask but it's just one of those things that I'm sure many adoptees want...

The 2020 Danroth Family Reunion is going to be a huge step forward for me. This time I know who I am... This time I can only hope that my 'Aunts and Uncles' come and embrace me as the niece they never knew they had. I'm scared that if I go to the Reunion they won't come, all because of me. I'm scared that the rest of the Danroth Family will be mad at me for being the reason they don't attend.

I can never win in this 'game of adoption'.

There's more to this reunion than what my original family knows. There are many more Adoptees coming...which means more healing for them. As well as myself.